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Forgive Yourself Momma!

June 7, 2018

 

I don't think many of us feel as if we're great parents. We are only human and often our parenting comes with human flaws. They are unavoidable really, no matter how hard we try. But today, I want you to forgive yourself. I want you to realize that you're working hard, you're trying hard, you're not a perfect parent and that's okay.

 

Often times we all feel like failures when it comes to parenting. It's normal! In fact, I would venture so far as to say that the ones who don't feel like parent failures are either in total denial and are the ones who actually are not doing a good job and don't care, or those who have learned to forgive themselves.

 

Once upon a time, I saw a counselor while going through some postpartum baby blues. I was thinking of myself as being a horrible mother. She gave me some insight that I've tried to keep in mind all of these years. On the left side she had me list what I believe to be the worst parent flaw ever (abandonment, abuse, neglect, etc). Then on the right side she had me list the best mom (Super Mom, the mom who does everything perfectly). My Donna Reed (if you remember her). She then drew a line bar between the two. She said that I was forgetting that there is a huge line between the worst parent and the best parent. Often we fall within those lines.

 

It's okay if we don't hit the far right, the Super Mom status, because it's actually unattainable aside from maybe a split second or moment. And unless we're on that extreme left where we are just doing the worst job we will often go back and forth on the bar at different points. It's normal. And more importantly it's okay. As long as we're trying, as long as we don't give up, and as long as we're doing the best job we can, it's okay to not be Super Mom.

 

You're trying. That's what's important. Forgive yourself and be happy being in the middle of the line.  

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© 2017 Appalachian Autumn

Autumn Semones

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